First of all there is Bob's look. He is bearded, which he has mainly been since Jerry died, and his hair is a bit fuzzier and bushier, also fully grey. In his old age, Bob looks more like Jerry now than ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVNzfWCek8c&feature=related
Bob's movements are much slower than in the old days. His singing voice starting to fade, even if his guitar playing remains like that of the days of old. In his quieter vocal range there is so much more emotion.
He plays like a man left alone, trying to continue to tell the stories he has been telling since 1965, although many of his friends and co-musicians are now absent leaving him to carry that weight and carry on the tunes.
And although most of the members of the Grateful Dead are still living, there is a ghostly presence to Bob Weir on stage alone. There seems to be the feeling of ghosts present, and not only the ghost of Jerry, but of an era long gone, children grown, and summer disolving into certain final winter.
Bob's onstage performance has left behind the showmanship he used to physically show, but instead he carry's it all in his facial expression and vocality.
And while I am not suggesting that Bob has lost the magic, I am implying that he is no longer the Bob Weir we remember. It's as if he suddenly aged while we were busy remembering him dancing on stage to the final moments of, ...sunshine daydream".
And as I listen to Bob sing, I look into the mirror wondering where my own youth has gone. Hair greying, waistline expanding ever so slightly. More and more I talk of the old days of my youth to uninterested kids who dismiss me as being old. I let them have their ignorance knowing that one day they themselves will be standing in my shoes, older and heavier, but hopefully with intelligence, families, and success.
Tomorrow, April 19th, 2012 I will be attending a concert event bringing us back to a Grateful Dead show from July 18th, 1989. My birthday is July 17th so this makes it extra exciting for me. But going back 23 years and realizing its been 23 years is amazing.
On stage will be all the Grateful Dead, even Jerry and Brent and for three hours I will be able to relive younger more innocent days. And Bob will look like the Bob I always envision in my mind.
As Jerry once said in the early 70's when he was barely 30, "...we're old and in the way".
My version is, "....we're old and getting grey" but every silver lining has a touch of grey!!!! But we will get by. We will survive.
And we have.
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