The $80 Dollar: AKA You Want Coke With That

Anyone who has read my Autobiography, " Mien Cough: The Saga of Sage Advice From An Unbalanced Muppet", with a foreward by Lenny Bruce knows more about my drug history than I ever intended.  I didn't have final approval for my book, thank you Random House, and they ended up putting in a bunch of extra shit in there that never really happened.  I shot heroin with Corey Haim nor Corey Feldman assholes!!!!

Its common knowledge that while writing for DYNAMITE Magazine during the 70's, I got in with the Grateful Dead trying desperately to get them on the cover.

I had just broken up with Lorene Yarnell (pictured right) of Shields and Yarnell when I realized that it was actually Shields that I had been fucking.  I've slept with so many people in my day I am sure a guy or two has gotten by me.

The Dead were playing the Nassau Colusieum one night and were in the middle of Eyes of the World when I noticed that a dollar bill had fallen out of the pocket of one of the roadies.

I thought to myself, "a dollar is a dollar", so I picked it up and put it under my hat.  The following day I was back at Jim Henson's Workshop rehearsing with my band The Electric Mayhem..

I was rehearsing a cover of James Taylor's, Fire and Rain when Animal came over to me and handed me the dollar bill. I guess it had fallen out of my hat.  Animal kept nodding his approval to me and suggested we go in to the bathroom for a band meeting, without the rest of the band.

We did and Animal unfolded the dollar to reveal a pile of white powder! "COooooo-caaaaainnneee!!!!!!", he growled as he pulled a short straw out of his back pocket and immediately took to snorting some.

Now Kermit had been doing this shit for years, and I realized long ago he was addicted.  Fucking Elton John was never allowed back stage again.  It explains why Kermit is so skinny. 


I decided to pass up the opportunity. Of course Animal had no complaints about that.  He tossed the straw aside and just dove his face into the pile. Then we went back to jamming.



Too this day I've never done Cocaine, that is until I realized what Crack was.