Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Angry Cup of Coffee

On a calm sunday morning I found myself at the local Starbucks sitting for coffee with a friend in the program.  It was our first "bro date".  We had hung out one time previously, serving dinner to wounded military men and it was a good time.  But this sunday morning seemed to be wrought with an air of tension. 

We sat and shared coffee and stories.  I noticed his bottle of NAKED JUICE, that claims to be organic and with no sugar added, but the sugar content in the bottle was 60grams anyway.  I was amazed.  I have begun to notice all this organic, no sugar added-type food that sits on the shelves at Trader Joe's and Whole Foods is really not all that healthy. In fact some of it is down right unhealthy.  So I made a comment to my friend, wanting to share my discovery, but I think he felt that I was somehow judging him.  He seemed offended and upset, as if I would choose a bottle of juice to attack or judge someone.  Come on I may be petty but I am not that petty.

We started talking about careers and I told him that I would like to get out of the Restuarant Industry because I want a more normal schedule and am tired with dealing with an ever increasingly moronic public.  But I also confessed that the Restaurant Industry is what I know and that I am good at it.  I could manage a fine establishment but would rather find a new career.  My already offended friend took this to mean that I was non-commital, and that I couldn't decide what I wanted.

What I am good at and what I want are two different things, or so I tried to explain.  I don't think he cared, because he basically started ranting that he didn't "believe in me" and then told me that I didn't need to get angry.  For a moment I thought he was speaking to someone else because I certainly wasn't angry or getting angry or thinking about anger. I was reeling from this sudden change in mood and trying to digest why I was suddenly being judged so harshly.

Was it a misunderstanding? Was he having a rough morning, or was it my comment about how unhealthy his juice was?

And after a minute or two of telling me he was not going to help me and that my resume was merely a rough draft he abruptly told me he had to go.

I was dumbfounded.  My desire for a relaxing cup of coffee had turned into a resentment and anger-filled rant by someone I don't really know who could probably break me in half without breaking a sweat and for a moment I thought he was going to.

We headed toward the exit, but not before I got a refill on my coffee.  Standing at the counter he threw a few more accusations my way and alot more not so subtle anger and annoyance.  He brought up the juice, and I had realized that my comments on the juice were somehow behind all of this!!!  I again tried to explain that I was commenting on the juice because I was suprised by it, not judging his choice. Of course, he then accused me of needing to justify my actions.

Oh boy.  So we headed out to the parking lot and he shook my hand and said, "so long".  I walked to my car shaking my head still trying to understand what had happened. 

I think I know what happened, and it irritates me, but I cannot control other people. I'm really disappointed in how this meeting turned out. 

Next time I think I'll just get some coffee by myself .