Monday, March 25, 2013

Black Jesus My Hero


I love Jesus so much, but what really brings me comfort is Black Jesus.  He is the true Jesus.

 

In my dreams, Black Jesus can kick everyone's ass.  He's in a gang called the Disciples so people respect him.


Sometimes after watching House, my black jesus looks like Omar Epps.

I love when black Jesus goes into bad neighborhoods and starts kicking ass.

Sometimes Black Jesus looks Rastafarian, which means he loves Bob Marley music and smokes a shit load of weed.

Any Jesus that smokes weed is a cool Jesus by me!!

Sometimes Black Jesus turns himself into Ron Jeremy so he can fuck hot pimply faced young white girls...


I guess what I'm really tring to say is that Black Jesus is so cool.  And I am such a big fan.  I really praise him and pray that one day he and I can hang out together. I'll take him out to eat....



Thank you Black Jesus for all that you do and all that you are. I love you.

-Dr. Teeth



Godzilla in the USA

It happens in Japan all the time.  We finally had 911 happen here in the USA.

But what I fear the most, the thought that keeps me up at night, is the possibility of a GODZILLA attack on the United States of America.

What is our government doing to keep us safe from a Godzilla attack?

After we dropped Nukes on Tokyo in 1945 little did we realize that part of the massive fall out of our actions was to create a nuclear monster taller than a tall building, and angrier than Rosie O'Donnell without a tampon.  We created Godzilla.

Now Godzilla is an American Made creature, but it lives in Japan, which it realized was the proper decision due to America's arduous citizenship process and it's treatment of illegals.  But what is too stop Godzilla from swimming across the ocean and onto our shores?


That is one menacing looking motherfucker.  Beware.

I have contacted The Pentagon to ask what battle plan they have in case of a Godzilla attack.  They have admitted that they've had a secret weapon in place for years to combat this threat.  It wasn't ready on 911 as they were still b, bring her back to life, but now the weapon is ready....


Nell Carter's Corpse.  Working out in the nude and ready to take on Godzilla.

But can Nell Carter's enormous body be enough to stop Godzilla's rampage?


This crowd of people certainly hope so and are keeping vigil around the country.

GODZILLA vs. NELL CARTER coming SUMMER 2013.

Will humanity survive!  Will America survive.

God Help us all Nell Carter.  Gimme a break!!!!!