Al Queda Summer Camp

I recently got a letter from my adopted son Tibor who has spent most of the summer at an Al Queda Summer Camp in Afghanistan....

Dear Father-

I hope this letter finds you well. I am having a great time at Al Queda Summer Camp for Children.  I have learned so many things this summer that will serve me in the future.  Our first week was spent hunting down women who made eye contact.  We set them on fire and then ate them.  It was the only meal we got the whole first week. 

This is me and the bitch I cooked.  She was so tasty.


We spent time in flight simulators.  I know how to fly and American Airline jet.  Odd thing is they didn't teach us take offs or landings.  And our simulator was aimed at important US monuments and points of interest.  If we hit the bulls-eye we got 100%.  Needless to say I am so good I got extra credit.



We learned bomb making, and it turns out I created the worlds smallest shoe bomb that is nuclear.  Kirstie Alli Jabar Shabazz says I was born for Al Queda.  I have converted to Islam because Ice Cube said in his 1991 album Death Certificate, "Islam nigga's are the craziest...", so I wanted to be like that.

This is my troop leader Sheik Abdul Cube.  He said I could grow a beard like his one day.

We just spent a few days at a place called Bengazi.  I thought that was the cream you put on sore muscles. We freed a bunch of people who have now joined our camp.  I love making new friends.

Tomorrow we are learning how to fuck goats......uhm, I think I will take the day off.


I can't wait for the summer to end because I decided what I am going to do for my final project here at Al Queda Summer Camp for Kids.....

I'M GONNA KILL EVERY LAST ONE OF THESE GOAT RAPING COCKSUCKERS....



These fuckers trained me to be a killer, so I am going to use my training against them.  I will avenge the United States of America.

Dearest Daddy, if I do not come home, just know that these Nike's helped save a nation.



With Warmest Regards-

Tibor