Thursday, May 30, 2013

Drinking Out Of Cups

What does this guy think he is, an indian?
What is he, a goddamn asshole? What the fuck is he doin’?
Not ever.
No way.
Now he’s Johnny Hammersticks. Hammered away like he’s freakin’ Tommy Noble.
What the hell’s he doin’?
Thinks he’s got it goin’ bossa nova … No way, no way…
What is the ga’bage? (garbage)
What is this? Oh I’m … king of the trees, I’m the tree-meister … I count on them.

[When sometimes I (brag? pry?) I like to (steelst)]
Yeah right …. yeeeah right
This guy’s a faggot. The guy’s some sort of faggot indian in the teepee. Who does this guy think he is, he’s Captain Knots? He thinks he’s Captain Tying Knots, when everyone needs some knots tied they go to him - BULL. SHIT. Bullshit

Aflkjg such a bitch, he thinks he’s Miss Sand (?), drinking out of cups…bein’ a bitch.

How ‘bout her fist? How bout her fabulusk(?) bardt (?)
Tired of the little kid in the background fuckin’ goin’ craaazzzaayy
Who’s this guy? Mr. Balloons. Mr. Balloon Hands. No way. No way, get real. Like those things

Mr. Walk Way. Mr. Walk Down Me, I’m The Walk Way … lead me to the building - fuck you!

5, 6, 4, 3

Yeeaheh Right!

Here’s some stupid bitch. Who paid for that floor? Not me. No way!
Never payin’ for no floor ever again. Not ONCE, not NEVA! Nope -

Who’s chair is that? Who brought that goddamn chair here - not my chair. Not my chair, not my problem - that’s what I say.

No way. Stupid dresses.
Stupid flowers.

Lighthouses rule. You don’t like the lighthouse, you suck!

What is this, Sea Horse Captain? What is this - Seahorse-Seashell party? Who didn’t invite me? Why didn’t I get invited?
Seahorse - Sea HELL. What is this? Get real. I’m in love with sea horses. I’m in love with ‘em. They’re so beautiful and cute - I’m in love with the seahorses. They’re fuckin’ unreal, I love them.

They’re like all the clocks - I love them. I love sea horses. And I love lookin’ at ‘em.
And I love SEA SHELLS. I love sea shell things. I love things with sea shells and sea horses on ‘em. Like blankets, and towels, and little bags. I love ‘em.

Sea horses. For-eva.

Ladies in Lingerie Coming Soon....


There girls are the finalists in the Doctor Teeth Ladies in Lingerie Contest for Spring 2013.  Vote Now!!!!!!!!!

 

Cards and Letters

I've decided to post a few random letters I have received from readers.  Not everyone is a fan, but most are.....


Dear Doc Teeth-

You can't be for real!! You are a sick and disgusting asshole hiding behind a pretend façade.  You were obviously beaten as a child and probably set on fire.  Go to hell! Your blog sucks and go fuck yourself.

-Richard Jenkins
Naperville Illinois
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Dear Dr. T-

You sick fucking bastard!!  I hope you rot in hell!!!! Fuck off!!!

-Gayle Swain
Lombard Illinois
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Dear Doctor Teeth-

Seriously this shit cracks me up! You are so funny. And I love the hot girls.  Keep it up and stay funny!!  I look forward to your blogs.

-Deshawn Johnson
Chicago Illinois
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Doctor Teeth-

Just another Conservative, Porno addicted asshole hiding behind a made up persona.  Why don'y you grow some balls and show us who you really are.  I bet you are a little child of a man who never had any friends.

-Name Withheld
Crete Illinois
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Dear Doc Teeth-

You show some hot girls on your blog, but are they as hot as me and my friends? (PHOTO INCLUDED)


-Amanda Cullen
Roselle Illinois

Hey Amanda, I think you and your girlfriends are super hot and I wanna invite you all over to my place for an after-hours party!!!!!!!!!!!!


That's it for today everybody.  More cards and letters to come soon.........