Sex With Midgets and/or Dwarfs

I'm one sick Muppet.  But I gotta be honest I think I wanna have sex with a midget and/or a dwarf.  First of all they are small and therefore certain things can happen that couldn't with a normie. 


Its kind of like screwing an underage person but legally.  I mean they have small hands, and small bodies so that fantasy is definitely possible.


I'd definitely take the two of these whores for a spin.


This porn got me to thinking about this very serious subject.  And now I want to fuck a midget and/or dwarf.

This is almost like a midget Octomom.  I would definitely fuck Bridget the Midget.  She can spin and jump and do flips.  She would also only be able to get the tip of Dr. Teeth's penis into her mouth.  Why is that good?  I am not sure I know.

Another midget and/or dward I'd have sex with is of course...


Gary Coleman.

But of course he's dead, which sucks.


I actually dated this indian midget but she dumped me for being too "small". That rotten bitch!!!

Teeth and the Pregnancy Scare

So I was dating this woman recently and we had a pregnancy scare.  Really she had the scare.  She thought she was pregnant. I  never thought she was but I found myself hoping that she was.  I thought about being a father and being with her and the three of us raising a child together.  It seemed beautiful.

Then I went to the library to use the computer and there were children running around.  I wanted to kill every last motherfucking one of them.



Then this mom had a new born and it was crying these shreiks that made me want to join Al Queda and fly an airplane into this baby.

So I think I learned a lesson.

1st -I am fucking insane to think I want a kid.
2nd-I think I just wanted to make this crazy relationship work at all cost.

The idea of having a screaming shit machine is more than I can bare.  I would rather be raped by sheep.


This is an artists rendition of what our baby would have looked like. It has my teeth.

Road to Recovery

I got to be honest. Being clean and sober isn't as great as I thought it'd be.  Its good to not have to constantly chase a high or spend so much money but its kind of boring.  I used to have fun being high.  Playing music, laughing with friends, and going on adventures.

Now I am clean and have become reclusive, angry, lonely and bored out of my fucking mind.  Sometimes when my teeth hurt from the grinding I do at night (since I got clean) or when I am watching a cool movie, or whatever, I want to light a bowl and take that smoke deep into my lungs and just let it all flow away.



I know that smoking pot will not solve my problems, but I don't think I'm looking for it to do so anymore. I think I have a clear understanding of what my problems are and I don't think pot is part of that in the way NA would have me believe.



Maybe its just because I am bored.
Maybe its just because I'm lonely.
Maybe its because I just don't care.

But I really want to smoke some weed today!!!!


And they want me to smoke it too.