So Dr. Teeth spent some time with LEXI SCHAFER back in 2003 in order to interview for a book he was working on about Blonde Bombshells in the 21st Century. LEXI SCHAFER and I met at the Galleria in Sherman Oaks, made famous in the movie Valley Girl. We sat and chatted over coffee
LEXI SCHAFER was dressed in a small white tshirt and jeans. So simple and yet so cute. Of course my being used to being surrounded by celebrities I could resist her charms, but only for about ten minutes.....
LEXI SCHAFER was so kind and nice and spoke extensively about her work as a blonde bombshell model recreating the looks of ANNA NICOLE SMITH, MARILYN MONROE and JAYNE MANSFIELD. She is also known for her many modelling photo's with her pets.
What most people don't know about LEXI SCHAFER is that she is an animal lover and animal rescuer. She does this for free rather than own a business. She takes strays into her home and finds them Forever Homes.
This touches me since I own four cats, three dogs and two elephants. And of course I have an ant collection but thats because I don't clean up my home very well.
LEXI SCHAFER told me she'd adopt my ants and find them a new place to live. I mean is this girl amazing or what?
My hat is off to you LEXI SCHAFER. God bless you and the wonderful work you do for all animal-kind.
Monday, June 18, 2012
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Dr. Teeth's Average White Man
So I recently have discovered some alarming statistics regarding the horrific homicide rates in Chicago. Now before I go any further I want you to know that I marched with Dr. King and saw Malcolm X when it came out and I never had a bad thing to say about Oprah, but the statistics show that in the city of Chicago each year 75% of the homicides are committed by African Americans and 76% of African American's are the victims of these crimes. That's an alarming rate and the numbers speak for themselves.
Now before you go writing me off as a racist, ignorant asshole I want you to realize one thing.....
I DID NOT MAKE THOSE STATISTICS UP FUCKERS!!!
In an attempt to figure out why African Americans kill each other in record numbers I decided to rent John Singleton's 1991 film, BOYZ IN THE HOOD. I watched this movie several times until I realized the answer lied within Furious Style's speech.
"Well, how you think the crack rock gets into the country? We don’t own any planes. We don’t own no ships. We are not the people who are flyin’ and floatin’ that shit in here. I know every time you turn on the TV that’s what you see, black people, selling the rock, pushing the rock, pushing the rock, yea, I know. But that wasn’t a problem as long as it was here, wasn’t a problem until it was in Iowa and it showed up on Wall Street where there are hardly any black people. Now if you want to talk about uh, guns, why is that there is a gun shop on almost every corner in this community? … Tell you why, for the same reason that there’s a liquor store on almost every corner in the black community. Why? They want us to kill ourselves. You go out to Beverly Hills, you don’t see that shit. But they want us to kill ourselves. Yea, the best way you can destroy a people, you take away their ability to reproduce themselves. Who is it that dyin’ out here on these streets every night? Y’all. Young brothers like yourselves. … You doin’ exactly what they want you to do. You have to think young brother, about your future, huh?"
Now before you go writing me off as a racist, ignorant asshole I want you to realize one thing.....
I DID NOT MAKE THOSE STATISTICS UP FUCKERS!!!
In an attempt to figure out why African Americans kill each other in record numbers I decided to rent John Singleton's 1991 film, BOYZ IN THE HOOD. I watched this movie several times until I realized the answer lied within Furious Style's speech.
"Well, how you think the crack rock gets into the country? We don’t own any planes. We don’t own no ships. We are not the people who are flyin’ and floatin’ that shit in here. I know every time you turn on the TV that’s what you see, black people, selling the rock, pushing the rock, pushing the rock, yea, I know. But that wasn’t a problem as long as it was here, wasn’t a problem until it was in Iowa and it showed up on Wall Street where there are hardly any black people. Now if you want to talk about uh, guns, why is that there is a gun shop on almost every corner in this community? … Tell you why, for the same reason that there’s a liquor store on almost every corner in the black community. Why? They want us to kill ourselves. You go out to Beverly Hills, you don’t see that shit. But they want us to kill ourselves. Yea, the best way you can destroy a people, you take away their ability to reproduce themselves. Who is it that dyin’ out here on these streets every night? Y’all. Young brothers like yourselves. … You doin’ exactly what they want you to do. You have to think young brother, about your future, huh?"
Well I for one was moved by his speech, but I don't think the White Man wants African American's to off themselves. I think they want to off themselves. But I cannot tell you why. Labeling them as ignorant or animals or criminals is just a short cut to real thought.
They have higher drop out rates, unemployment rates, incarceration rates, etc..
They are less likely to receive a loan. They are less likely to own a home. They are less likely to watch the Brady Bunch (just making sure your paying attention)
But after all is said and done, why are the African American male population under that age of 30 killing each other off in Chicago, Los Angeles and New York in such horrific numbers?
Gangs! Drugs and money have completely corrupted the black youth and with generations teaching other generations that there is no alternative, the cycle repeats itself over and over.
And in an age where guns and money seem to equal power, what else would you expect.
Even the rich and successful African American rappers and actors can't seem to avoid the shootings (Biggie and Tupac) or the fights, (Drake and Chris Brown) and these events occur all the time.
You'd think once they were famous and could get out of the Hood, they would. But you can take a man out of the Hood, but you can't necessarily take the Hood out of the man.
And that's another part of the problem.
In the end I will quote a zombie film, "You must stop the killing to win the war."
At least stop listening to the movies, songs, and media.
Dr. Teeth: A Muppet Amongst Men
What a restless night for Dr. Teeth. I spent part of my day on the phone with Stella Blue trying to get that train of love back on some sort of forward track, but my own mental disqualifications made my play very difficult. Imagine Billy Crystal trying to convey to Meg Ryan his love right after a lobotomy and that's how it felt. I felt like the town drunkard in an old black and white film.
The entire day was like a slow motion nightmare to which I couldn't awake. My own mind was finally turning against me. Moments of mental emptiness coupled with moments of dry heaving made for a fine Saturday.
There were upshots like receiving the photo's from Lex. She is such a beautiful and amazing person. She is the Smurfette in a kingdom of Smurfs. She stands alone. But even Lex and a pair of jumper cables couldn't get Dr. Teeth's brain working again.
Depression, uncertainty and loneliness make for strange bedfellows. I feel like my mind is actually turning to melted butter, but this was no errant LSD trip, no not this time. This is life how I know it.
And after a few hours of work, where I managed to come alive. It was back home in the safe sanctity of my "hospital bed". Where I lie, where I hide, where I moan, and where I'll probably die.
Late night gives itself over to sleep. What a relief to sleep. The only way to escape being awake. But then those dreams begin. The Using Dreams.
Using Dreams are common amongst addicts. In these dreams we are using the drugs we shouldn't be in the waking world, and sometimes these dreams of using are great but sometimes they are nightmarish. In the beginning the dream would start the second after I took that first hit. Now they mainly involve me purchasing or being involved somewhere in the drug world. But at some point no matter the style of the Using Dream, I will get high. And within the dream I will realize that I have relapsed.
Usually these dreams will end in my waking up nervous as a man on a tightrope, only to realize that it was a dream and that I haven't lost my sobriety. It was only a ill-mannered dream meant to make me worry.
The part of the dream I like is waking up realizing I hadn't used though. Its always a relief.
Dr. Teeth needs to find a hobby. But more importantly he needs to have the mental capacity and ability to actually get out of bed and do it. So far he's struck out........
The entire day was like a slow motion nightmare to which I couldn't awake. My own mind was finally turning against me. Moments of mental emptiness coupled with moments of dry heaving made for a fine Saturday.
There were upshots like receiving the photo's from Lex. She is such a beautiful and amazing person. She is the Smurfette in a kingdom of Smurfs. She stands alone. But even Lex and a pair of jumper cables couldn't get Dr. Teeth's brain working again.
Depression, uncertainty and loneliness make for strange bedfellows. I feel like my mind is actually turning to melted butter, but this was no errant LSD trip, no not this time. This is life how I know it.
And after a few hours of work, where I managed to come alive. It was back home in the safe sanctity of my "hospital bed". Where I lie, where I hide, where I moan, and where I'll probably die.
Late night gives itself over to sleep. What a relief to sleep. The only way to escape being awake. But then those dreams begin. The Using Dreams.
Using Dreams are common amongst addicts. In these dreams we are using the drugs we shouldn't be in the waking world, and sometimes these dreams of using are great but sometimes they are nightmarish. In the beginning the dream would start the second after I took that first hit. Now they mainly involve me purchasing or being involved somewhere in the drug world. But at some point no matter the style of the Using Dream, I will get high. And within the dream I will realize that I have relapsed.
Usually these dreams will end in my waking up nervous as a man on a tightrope, only to realize that it was a dream and that I haven't lost my sobriety. It was only a ill-mannered dream meant to make me worry.
The part of the dream I like is waking up realizing I hadn't used though. Its always a relief.
Dr. Teeth needs to find a hobby. But more importantly he needs to have the mental capacity and ability to actually get out of bed and do it. So far he's struck out........
Saturday, June 16, 2012
The Gorgeous Lexi Schafer
Dr. Teeth has many celebrity friends and he has dated more than a few models. But.......
I'm proud to call this woman my friend. She is a model, but more importantly she dedicates her life to the care and rescue of needy animals. These are photo's I took of her back in 2003 when I was interviewing her for a modeling magazine. Who knew that 7 years later we'd actually become friends.
She has a heart bigger than most!!!
I'm proud to call this woman my friend. She is a model, but more importantly she dedicates her life to the care and rescue of needy animals. These are photo's I took of her back in 2003 when I was interviewing her for a modeling magazine. Who knew that 7 years later we'd actually become friends.
She has a heart bigger than most!!!
Another Fathers Day
Dr. Teeth doesn't lie. He wears his heart on his sleeve. He is honest to a fault and he'd like to tell you something.
I haven't spoken to my father in 21 years and at this point I have no idea where he is. I haven't a clue whether he is alive or dead, or whether he is in the CIA or working the midnight shift at a local 7-11.
Now my stepfather raised me for the most part and I haven't seen nor spoken to him in 16 years.
You may ask, "Dr. Teeth you handsome bastard, why don't you speak to your fathers?" Well I can tell you that its more their fault then mine. They have turned their backs on my.
Its wonderous to be denied by your own flesh and blood, but how many of us get to be denied by more than one father? I struck gold twice.
And to boot I haven't spoken to my brother in 13 years, because he would rather let us wonder if he's alive or dead. He wants nothing to do with the family.
So lets take score here......
Real Dad........GONE
Step Dad........GONE
Brother..........GONE/MISSING
MOTHER.......ALWAYS HERE!!!!!!!
So I may have gotten stuck with shitty male role models who abandoned me, but at least my mother has never given up on me. And as a constantly depressed adult with emotional issues, my mother sticking by me makes her a saint.
St. Mom
Thank you Mom!!!
I haven't spoken to my father in 21 years and at this point I have no idea where he is. I haven't a clue whether he is alive or dead, or whether he is in the CIA or working the midnight shift at a local 7-11.
Now my stepfather raised me for the most part and I haven't seen nor spoken to him in 16 years.
You may ask, "Dr. Teeth you handsome bastard, why don't you speak to your fathers?" Well I can tell you that its more their fault then mine. They have turned their backs on my.
Its wonderous to be denied by your own flesh and blood, but how many of us get to be denied by more than one father? I struck gold twice.
And to boot I haven't spoken to my brother in 13 years, because he would rather let us wonder if he's alive or dead. He wants nothing to do with the family.
So lets take score here......
Real Dad........GONE
Step Dad........GONE
Brother..........GONE/MISSING
MOTHER.......ALWAYS HERE!!!!!!!
So I may have gotten stuck with shitty male role models who abandoned me, but at least my mother has never given up on me. And as a constantly depressed adult with emotional issues, my mother sticking by me makes her a saint.
St. Mom
Thank you Mom!!!
Thursday, June 14, 2012
The Stolen Identity Fiasco
So Dr. Teeth was contacted by the IRS the other day. Seems that someone has stolen my identity but thankfully not my act. Bastards!!!
The good news is my identity itself is a stolen one, so they actually stole someone else's identity. The jokes on them, even if its not a very funny, Jackie Mason sort of joke.
But now I have to go out there and steal another identity. Maybe I have to become a smurf rather than a muppet.
Fucking Smurfs.
Smurfette looks rather sexy!!!
The good news is my identity itself is a stolen one, so they actually stole someone else's identity. The jokes on them, even if its not a very funny, Jackie Mason sort of joke.
But now I have to go out there and steal another identity. Maybe I have to become a smurf rather than a muppet.
Fucking Smurfs.
Smurfette looks rather sexy!!!Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Suicide Sexy Wednesday
Yes Please! I'd love some Ice Cream.
Love the bracelett.
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