This is a website I invested a few bucks in. Its dedicated to finding older, white trash Australian broads to fuck!!! I've been down under if ya know what I mean and some of these older women could carry a baby kangaroo in their loose FUPA's.
What do I care. We had a one month gig in Aussieland and I needed to get laid. Since Fonzi couldn't bring his fucking motorcycle on the plane he left me alone to fend for myself. I've heard of security blankets, but a fucking security motorcycle???? I told that Jew posing as an Italian to eat my furry, super glued Muppet ass. We've never spoken again.
So I called GrannyShazzas and they hooked me up with this beaut....
I'm pretty sure she was half Dingo/ half woman. But she could do this trick with her anal muscles that made me crazy. She was also very willing to let me put a bag on her head.
Then I ran into these two fucking monsters in the airport terminal before boarding my Quantas flight.
They were named Ugly and Fugly!! They were sisters and of course they loved the Muppet Show. If I had ever wished I had never been a fucking Muppet it was then. But of course the one needed $20 for braces and the other needed $30 for a facemask so I decided to give these two a whirl. What I found out was that neither of them had a Vag. They were both born with two assholes. It was a first for me indeed. (actually when I smelled their breath I suspected they were born with three assholes each).
Well I looked around and realized that the best piece of ass in Australia would either be a Kangaroo or Crocodile Dundee himself. And fuck that Aussie scumbag.
So I invested in GrannyShazzas to make the rest of the continent suffer.
These are my investment partners. DNA tests have been inconclusive......
Holy shit.
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