From Beiber to Stern

Its been a crazy week. 

Well not really, because I am not a celebrity but I had a "wet dream" the other night so here goes...

I had this dream that Bieber, Lohan, Bynes, Octomom, Tan Mom, Farrah Abraham, Kim K, and assorted other annoying celebritards were all in the same airplane that was hijacked by 19 Saudi Arabian terrorists and the plane was flown into the side of Mount Rushmore.

The plane survived.
The hijacking jihadists survived.
The Mount survived, but....

The Celebritards all died from massive stupidity and lack of purpose.

The Feds couldn't identify the bodies because they didn't give a FUCK!!!


In other Blogitaboutit News,

Is it me or does Justin Bieber look like Brandon Tina (Hilary Swank) in Boys Don't Cry?




And finally, What the fuck happened to HOWARD STERN?!!!!  Co-Hosting America's Got Talent has shown that Howards relentless battle to be loved and accepted still hasn't ended.

He has $400 million and a hot fucking wife.  Three healthy kids and is probably the most recognizable and successful broadcasters in radio history, but NO...........

He's got to be one of four losers on a loser TV show where America DOESN'T HAVE SHIT FOR TALENT!!!
Fuck you Howard Stern you turd!!!!!


Take Care Folks-

I'm outta here.....

James Gandolfini What The Fuck

James Gandolfini was this amazing actor who portrayed the most amazing character on HBO's The Soprano's from start to its awful finish.  Even during that last season, while the show sucked, Gandolfini's acting did not.

But since that show went off the air 6 years ago, Gandolfini's acting choices have become questionable.

He has mainly done bit parts in movies that either haven't done very well, or have done well no thanks to his involvement.  He was in the remake of Taking of Pelham 1-2-3 as the mayor, but the movie sucked.  He was in Zero Dark 30, but his role did nothing to assist the film.

In many ways his most successful role since the Soprano's was as Carol in the amazing and underrated Where the Wild Things Are. Although its his voice that appears not his face.

But for the most part James has been appearing in small movies that no one really sees.
.

In The Loop, Down the Shore, Welcome to the Reilly's, Not Fade Away....

Sure he popped up in The Incredible Burt Wonderstone, a movie I enjoyed, but again he was relegated to guest star status.

When is Gandolfini going to go back to helming something big and something great? 

On a side note: His return to mafia territory in the vastly underrated Killing Them Softly seemed as aimless and wasted as his character in the film.  But I bet James purposely picked out a mafia-type that was so anti-Tony in his presence. 

I hate to admit it, but I'd like to see him do what DeNiro did and poke fun at his mafia status like Analyze This.

I know he doesn't need to money and maybe he finds these smaller roles more challenging, but they are not adding up to much from the viewer perspective.  Especially if the viewer doesn't see the film.

Come back to the light James.  We're waiting for you....

Furry Women or Silky Smooth

I wanna be honest.  I wanna be real.

Women who look like they are sitting on top of a shaggy dog turn me off.  We are not cave people anymore.  There are razors and all sorts of shaving creams.  You need to shave your shit.  Do you really like having your crotch and ass full of hair?  Do you wonder why the guy doesn't enjoy going down on you?

Shave that shit up a bit. You don't have to go Mr. Clean bald, but I bought you a razor so use it. I didn't buy it for your face.  I bought it for your lady parts.

And if you haven't shaved and wanna get into some strange foreplay, I'll shave you while you watch Real Housewives of I Don't Give A Fuck.....



This is a photo of my ex girlfriend Jeannine.  She refused to shave.  I refused to date her.



This is what happens when a blind girl tries to shave while driving in traffic. 

And now a word from our sponsor......

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I have hundreds of readers reading my shit and no one ever comments. Leave me a message or email me at blogitaboutit@hotmail.com

I wanna hear from you.........

Doctor Teeth Sometimes Human....

I'm not always up for posting pics of young hotties or taking on the government.  I'm not always in the mood to make fun of sitcom stars and the hypocrisy of life.  Sometimes I wanna be real.  Sometimes I want to let you all know how I feel.

Tired.  Depressed. Full of anxiety and rage.  Alone.  Dreaming.  Music.  Waiting for the sun......

Whatever. 

I am reality illusion.  I am the promise of nothing.  I am a muppet without a place to lay my head.

You come here for the filth, but I come here to clear my mind of the clutter.

Enjoy the show!  Maybe you'll get a meltdown or two.... or just more pictures like this....

Romance and Coffee (While Thinking of Before Sunrise)

"It's early in the morning, bout a quarter to 3 and I'm just sittin here talkin to my baby over cigarette's and coffee......"

Something about that image sits restlessly in my mind.  Late night caffeine, nicotine and that conversation about why things aren't working out between us, when that first time I met you my heart raced and my mind couldn't focus on anything or anyone but you.

Sitting lazily on a chair and consuming movies like Before Sunrise wondering if I'd ever find myself in that situation asking a beautiful woman to get off the train with me for a walk through Vienna.

Does that scenario even exist anywhere but the fantasy world of the cinema?

Where is the romance in this particular time.  It seems so natural that it would exist.  But even if I realize that the movie is a movie, I still believe that romance is real....or do I?

My heart cries out for more than a one night stand or a trip to the coffee shop for empty conversation while resisting the urge to check my phone that buzzes with the latest non sequitor text message telling me nothing I currently need to know.

When a walk in the rain, a cup of coffee and a lazy afternoon watching couples fall in love doesn't equal a connection, then I don't know what does. 

When you have wandered this place for four decades and still find yourself wandering alone, you wonder if romance is dead.

And I think what would happen if Jesse and Celine got together, would they now be found at Walmart getting green colored yogurt for their children, or sitting in the drive thru at McDonalds, barely tolerating each other while they wait for their $1 sandwich.

And for every beautiful woman who passes by, my heart gets hopeful, but that quickly fades when I realize that she doesn't even notice me.

I want to exist solely in the confines of a movie.  Pure and final escapism for the endlessly jaded.

I just want one more cup of coffee with you.....whomever you are.